This poem was written at 4 am EST on February 3, 2007 while I was on vacation last year in Lantana, FL. First the poem; then some of the rest of what I wrote as an intended message for someone whom I suspect may never have received that message. Perhaps others need to read it too. Peace.
The ocean holds many secrets that it will never tell In the mirror I see its reflection behind a silvery veil. The sun beats down upon it reflecting sparkling light Like the full moon shining down casts diamonds in the night. No human contact touches, yet love reaches out to us. Understanding received, surrounds, strong love, and thus I see a "reflection in the mirror" of time now flown away -- I know that there will be a glorious, bright new day. The winds here are capricious, changing at the speed of thought Like the faces of the people as closure and peace are sought. So many sparkles of light reflected in Ocean's depths. The secrets held within Her remain beyond death. Yet spirits climb like birds soaring up into Ocean's skies And so the Light continues on as each life passes by.
Written on 2/07/07: I went there seeking closure to numerous things, not knowing why exactly, at least not one hundred percent of why. I only knew part of it, and I did feel the ocean calling me to that particular spot. I had forgotten much. I needed closure regarding my great aunt, closure regarding some childhood memories, and I went to say goodbye. I've never seen such clear turquoise colored water at the ocean. I never saw the dolphins play so close to shore. My visit touched a place in my heart that is now healing, and I am glad for that.
I wish so much that my natural straightforwardness and honesty would have prevailed over untruths. What's done is done and cannot be undone. I don't recall certain things until someone follows through upon a threat they made. The ocean beckons yet again to a point of origin where we first met. Dad encouraged me to get out of here now and come home. There is so much I wish I could say to you, but I know you are extremely busy, and I have (and had) no desire to intrude.
I am torn between remaining here and facing whatever comes because a part of me wants to stay for my youngest son. Yet I know I should go. I tried so hard for so long, only to have other people discredit my integrity. Secrets remain secrets; it's hard because so many people are trying to get me to tell them what those secrets are, and they are being ruthless about it.
This is the remainder of what I wrote after the poetic portion last Saturday so early in the morning (I still have this in the little memo book that I originally wrote it): The unborn turtle still within it's mother's protective egg lies exposed in the warm sand, its life never to be lived. Yet still it gives nurturing life as nature feeds itself. At 4 am, I awakened from peaceful slumber hearing Ocean's call -- feeling love outpoured -- acceptance & forgiveness. The dream was real -- your spirit touching mine once more. (Purposefully leaving out last sentence ... too personal.)
Ah the beauty and the sadness of love at a distance never fulfilled in an earthly manner, simply spiritual and ever supportive from a distance. A name forgotten for a time, but never the face or the spirit of that name's owner. I didn't listen to the music for a very long time, because I did not want to draw the wrong type of attention to you. Be blessed, wherever you go, whatever you do, and never forget. Please understand why I have written (and now posted) this message now, and don't be angry any more. I still love chenille sweaters (LOL! -- you should have seen the expression on your face! ) It has nothing to do with anything but you and I and closure.
For those of you who have no idea, have fun figuring it out. LOL! For the one to whom this message was originally intended: it is long overdue that you see it and KNOW beyond a shadow of a doubt that it IS real. Oh, and I apologize in advance if anyone feels that I have infringed on anyone's copyrights by using the title as written above. I wouldn't want to do that.
Until the very last moment ... may you be at peace,
Lanette
"Poetry is the revelation of a feeling that the poet believes to be interior and personal which the reader recognizes as his own." ~Salvatore Quasimodo~
" I like intelligent women. When you go out, it shouldn't be a staring contest." ~Frank Sinatra~
and yet the underlying release and joy of just KNOWING. ~soft smile through the tears~
Until the very last moment ... may you be at peace,
Lanette
"Poetry is the revelation of a feeling that the poet believes to be interior and personal which the reader recognizes as his own." ~Salvatore Quasimodo~
" I like intelligent women. When you go out, it shouldn't be a staring contest." ~Frank Sinatra~
Now you have gone and done it! I am in tears too. Love & Hugs! Diana PS next time you IM me please give me a minute to open the im. It is hard to close enough pages to open the im catcher. Hugs!
I would hope, Diana, that they are healing and releasing tears for you as well. ~gentle hug~
Sorry about the IM thing, I ran out of time for IMs on the cell. Will have to wait until I buy more time for that phone ... maybe May?
Until the very last moment ... may you be at peace,
Lanette
"Poetry is the revelation of a feeling that the poet believes to be interior and personal which the reader recognizes as his own." ~Salvatore Quasimodo~
" I like intelligent women. When you go out, it shouldn't be a staring contest." ~Frank Sinatra~
Lanette, A cloud has been lifted and the sun now shines through. Peace is in the horizons far to deep for others to understand. You see, it is now your time to overflow. The wait is almost over and evil will try to show his ugly head, it's not really there, it's only a shadow wishing and hoping to rise above the dream. Have no fear my dear, it can not be done. Always remember I have your back. This I know that you understand, there will be peace at last and it's about time. True feeling always win in the end. Peace my sister, the glory will be your's. There is always someone close that will help you, when you help yourself. A friend in yanni, mbkiser (sister 15)
"Only the heart speaks to the heart". This is about as big as the heart can get.
Thank you.
quote:
Hurt and/or happy, I feel these hearts are ALIVE.
Indeed, these hearts are very much ALIVE.
Until the very last moment ... may you be at peace,
Lanette
"Poetry is the revelation of a feeling that the poet believes to be interior and personal which the reader recognizes as his own." ~Salvatore Quasimodo~
" I like intelligent women. When you go out, it shouldn't be a staring contest." ~Frank Sinatra~
And Mildred? I thank you very much for your thoughtful (and may I say? thought provoking ) words as written above. Let it rest now, my sister. ~gentle heartfelt hug and soft smile~
Until the very last moment ... may you be at peace,
Lanette
"Poetry is the revelation of a feeling that the poet believes to be interior and personal which the reader recognizes as his own." ~Salvatore Quasimodo~
" I like intelligent women. When you go out, it shouldn't be a staring contest." ~Frank Sinatra~
The cloud was lifted, but it's getting mighty cloudy again.
~sigh~
Until the very last moment ... may you be at peace,
Lanette
"Poetry is the revelation of a feeling that the poet believes to be interior and personal which the reader recognizes as his own." ~Salvatore Quasimodo~
" I like intelligent women. When you go out, it shouldn't be a staring contest." ~Frank Sinatra~
Topic Closed
) It has nothing to do with anything but you and I and closure.
For the one to whom this message was originally intended: it is long overdue that you see it and KNOW beyond a shadow of a doubt that it IS real. 
I wouldn't want to do that. 
