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Yanni Fan
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TRUST

"You may be deceived if you trust too much, but you will live in torment if you don't trust enough...to be trusted is a greater compliment than to be loved."

Very interesting quote, indeed.

"You can be deceived if you trust too much," Hmmm, this statement implies that the author is one who does not want to take responsibility for his/her situation. It implies that one can be deceived BECAUSE one trusts too much, not because the other person is a deceiver... Trusting someone, whether too much or too little, does not CAUSE another to deceive.

",but you will live in torment if you don't trust enough." Hmmm again. One can live in torment no matter what the degree of trust; it is a choice.

"To be trusted is a greater compliment than to be loved." Oh boy! How saddening. There is no greater compliment than to be loved, for it comes from the heart, not the head. The head is shallow, pliable, and changes. The heart runs deep, is solid, and remains constant. The head changes WITH the circumstances, the heart remains constant DESPITE the circumstances.

The heartache comes when one cannot see into that depth, or chooses not to. And one who cannot read the heart, will be utterly alone.

I also believe that if one does not trust AT ALL, one will miss out on an abundance of joy. Be grateful for the joy; be grateful for the lesson, trust in Him, and love.

For, as is written, per Paul to the Corinthians...

"So faith, hope, love abide, these three, but the greatest of these is love."

Trust is a choice, determined by one's TRUE desires; trust is for THIS life.

Love is not always a conscious choice; the heart does the choosing; and love is for eternity.

This is just my opinion...I don't know...just had to write, because this quote hit me all wrong last night...no need to respond...it makes me feel heard just to write it...


Sassy Kitty/Sister 101
Sanity is HIGHLY Overrated!
 
Registered:: September 28, 2003Report This Post
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Kathy60, thanks for sharing.
I agree with your thoughts.


"Gotta Love It!":-)
 
Registered:: August 27, 2006Report This Post
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Thank you, Navigator. Smiler

LAW,
I also trust everyone until they give me a reason not to. In my last relationship, there were many indications that I chose to disbelieve, give the benefit of the doubt, and truly believed that a good, honest woman would allow this person to shine and love totally.

Several really huge things happened, and I was hurt very badly, my reputation tarnished, and I lost a LOT, but I forgave and continued to love and live with my heart.

This last incident was just too much. I was accused of something very awful, and it ended our relationship.

The heartache I feel now lies in the fact that I was honest and truthful, and that didn't come out and is still not out. I have evidence that this person was wrong, and the accusation baseless.

The struggle I face now involves the intense drive to prove it to him, not to get him back, because that cannot happen, but to restore my character in his eyes. I struggle with the idea that it was the Lord telling me(not for the first time) to give up and trying to teach me the lesson of humility. If I know and He knows, shouldn't that be enough? Or is it my ego that wants to prove myself truthful and make me feel whole again?

All I know is that I think about it very very often, and I need to let it go and move on.

Who knows...kind of in limbo right now, and the most important thing at this moment is to get physically well; it is essential in my quest to find closure.
Thanx for the input. Smiler


Sassy Kitty/Sister 101
Sanity is HIGHLY Overrated!
 
Registered:: September 28, 2003Report This Post
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Hi Kathy60 and Angel.
quote:
If I know and He knows, shouldn't that be enough? Or is it my ego that wants to prove myself truthful and make me feel whole again?
It might not be about you/your ego, but just an urge from up above to make others who are important people in your life to realize that you are being truthful and in turn (somehow) help them in thier own lives. God might be using you as a vessel to help others. Only you will be able to tell the difference.
Kathy60, I am sorry that you have been having this trouble and I understand and know how you feel.


"Gotta Love It!":-)
 
Registered:: August 27, 2006Report This Post
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Wow, Navi! You don't know how validating this reply was.
Early on, I felt like I was being given a task by Him, felt I was hanging on because I needed to, and I asked God to help me, to let me know somehow if I was doing the right thing.
As the end happened, I began to believe that God had sent me several boats, which I hadn't gotten into, and this was going to be my last boat.
It warms my heart to her someone say that perhaps I WAS doing His work after all.

You are an angel. Smiler


Sassy Kitty/Sister 101
Sanity is HIGHLY Overrated!
 
Registered:: September 28, 2003Report This Post
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dear kathy,

my heart goes out to you and i am sincerely sorry you are hurting. (gentle hug) in listening, i find myself so wanting to stop you from raking yourself over the proverbial coals of life's 'stuff'...instead, i would love to see you raking away those coals and exposing the truth of your worth (which is never determined by other's actions or opinions) and trusting that your wholeness has always, and will continue to always, be intact! may you find the peace and closure you seek. (gentle hug, again)

di
 
Registered:: July 29, 2001Report This Post
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Thanx so much, Di.
My battle is in the decision to take a very specific action or to let go and have a life-altering person believe in his thoughts that I am the "immoral" person he accuses me of being. Down in my heart, there is a compulsion to show him, let him grow from the lesson, and apply it in his life as it moves on.


Sassy Kitty/Sister 101
Sanity is HIGHLY Overrated!
 
Registered:: September 28, 2003Report This Post
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quote:
believe in his thoughts that I am the "immoral" person he accuses me of being. Down in my heart, there is a compulsion to show him, let him grow from the lesson, and apply it in his life as it moves on.


At first, when I read the opening comments of this string, I wanted to research about trust.

But, I resisted and read the rest of the comments which brings the bottom line to....control


You mentioned choices in love, trust, and belief of one's morality.

Manipulative control comes in many forms other than violence. It can come as accusations pointed at a person's very core of their morality and pesonality. Manipulators seek control over others by bringing them down.

The thing about this situation is that the one doing the accusing, the controlling, and even hurting does not trust anyone, not even themselves. What is worse? They don't think they are doing anything wrong.

Where there is no trust, fear abounds. Where there is fear, love cannot grow.

One final thing, K60, no matter how long, how hard, or how much you try to "show him" he will never "see" the truth of you.

"why do you let him continue to define who you are?" quote by our loveable Di!!!! way back in some very troubled times in my life....tnx again Di. I knew you would be on this string of comments somewhere......

You are right, K60, there is only one thing to do...move on away from it. After seven long years, I still feel that urge to show him.....but alas....he will never see it.

(((((((((((((K60))))))))))))))))




Anyone finding my mind, please send it back to me. I will pay for postage.

chalam55@yahoo.com
Website: http://lucindabilya.weebly.com
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Registered:: January 11, 2001Report This Post
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Hi sweet Kathy....
It is ture that I don't know you at all,but I Can tell that you are a very sweet and nice girl.
(I was hurt very badly)I'm sorry to hear that.

for me I believe that(If someone betrays you once,it is his fault;If he betrays you twice ,it is your fault)

If he can't see the truth of you...it is his fault...
HUGS.
 
Registered:: December 31, 2007Report This Post
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Hi there, Rima...thank you for those words; I like them and my head can understand what you are saying.

Hermie, sweet thang,
I understand in my head what you so eloquently wrote; it describes what I have felt, but couldn't put into words.
And now my heart can come together with the rationale, and I can move on. I have already done so much and all I can do for this love.
...prayers for him...

...humble thanx, Herms...


Sassy Kitty/Sister 101
Sanity is HIGHLY Overrated!
 
Registered:: September 28, 2003Report This Post
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